Think You Know Me?

I hate it when people automatically think that they know me.

You know my image.

The person walking through the halls isn't the real me.

You'd know that if you even tried to see me the way I see myself.

You know nothing but my style of clothing and the kind of person I seem to be.

Get to know me and you will see that I'm not the girl you think I am.

I'm nothing like the girl you claim you know.

Do I Really Regret It?

So many things i wish i could change.

I wish I could have a redo here and there.

They say to live without regret,

to never look back.

I've tried.

I still live by the moto but if you did have a chance to go back and change it would you?

If it meant a better future could you give into temptation?

Nice thought,

But no.

I hate some of the things I have done,

But without that horrible past I wouldn't be as strong as I am now.

I wouldn't be the person I am today.

As horrible as some of those things were they are nothing compared to what I feel and who I am.

At the end of the day all that matter is that you can forgive the past to face the future.

Views of Gay Marriage

so my friend was doing a research project for school and it was about prop 8 and this is exactly how I feel about prop 8: I think it is wrong for people to tell gays that they don't have the right to live their life and be just as happy or miserable as the rest of us especially when allowing gays the right to marriage doesn't even affect the rest of us because since I personally am attracted to people of the same sex i really dislike the fact that people are choosing whether or not I can marry a woman. when again it does NOT have any affect on any straight person what so ever.

I wrote this a while ago and I never added this little part. My own father was probably one of those people who voted yes on prop 8 and that hurts. He's also the kind of man who thinks that something is mentaly wrong or off with anyone who is gay, bi, or lezbian or transgender. He gets so mad at me for saying that I am a bisexual when that is what I truely am and if anyone who is gay or bi or lezbian reads this blog I hope you know that if you're parents do not understand then take it from someone who does. There are others out there just like you who know what you are going through and feel your pain.

Breaking Free

She used to live for the world trying to be what everyone wanted her to be.

The problem being that everyone wanted her to be something different. Then one day she realized that she wasn't happy.

Well she culdn't figure out why so she just stopped trying.

Stopped living her life the way everyone wanted her to.

She went numb.

Then something inside her awakened.

Her need to live her own life,

To be free.

She did.

She finally lived her life the way she wanted to,

And found that the people that truely love her love her just the way she is. And she was finally happy with her life.

I Change for No One

I'd love to say I'm sorry for being different but that would be like saying sorry for the rain pointless.

But I would never be sorry for the rain I love the rain just like I love being different.

Because it means I'm being a really person.

I'm being me.

So instead of sayin sorry for that because I'm not I'll tell you why I'm not sorry:

See you're mad at me because I won't follow all your screwed up rules that say everyone has to be just like you.

Because I'm not just like you.

I never have been never will be.

Never want to be.

So go try to turn some one else into a clone because sorry you failed I'm still here,

And I'm still me and you can't do anything to change that so no I didn't do what you wanted and no I'm not sorry for it,

And saying that I am well that would be a lie.

Because the truth is that I am extatic that you were not able to change me.

Who to Trust

How do you know who to trust when trust is one thing you've been stripped of over and over again?

Everyone says you can trust them, but which ones are really telling you the honest to God truth?

So many claim to be your best friend and to always have your back.

More often than not they stab you in the back.

How do you know when you really can trust someone?

Or if you can ever trust again?

Are You Okay?

People keep asking if you're okay,

But what they don't understand is that even though you smile and say nothing's wrong,

They really shouldn't have to ask.

Something is always wrong when they have to ask.

They will just keep bugging but never fully understand.

They don't really care, yet keep bugging to see what's wrong.

All they want is to pretend to be there.

When people ask what's wrong you just say you're fine and walk away even though you're bleeding inside.

Sick of Rules

I am so sick of all the rules.
It's always don't do this,
Don't do that,

Don't sing,

Don't dance,

Stop reading.

Well what is next?

Don't have fun,

Don't live,

Don't breathe?

I'd rather die!

If I can't be me then I'm not free, and that my friend is a curse you can keep.

Keep your conformity, your rules, and your prison.

I'll keep my personality.

Lies

Lies, lies, and more lies.
Seems like life is full of them.
Can no one go more than two seconds without lying to my face?
No, I guess not.
But what you need to understand is that, yeah you think you are getting away with you're dirty little secrets, but i know the truth, whether you tell it to me or not.
I've known you lie, I've just chosen to ignore it.
What you don't realize is that I can't stand you anymore.
Why would I even want to try?
You can't be honest and I don't want you around any longer.
I do not need your lies to make me feel better about myself.
So take your lies and keep them the hell away from me!
I hope they keep you warm at night because that isn't my job anymore.

What Makes it Okay?

What makes it alright to chose a woman you don't even know over your own kids?

What makes it okay to abandon your daughter when she needs you most?

What makes it okay to tell your woman she is right when she is dead wrong?

What makes a fucked up family okay?

That you are in love with her even if it's ruining your family?

Is that what makes ruining your children's lives forever worth while?

As long as you are "happy", what does it matter that your children are suffering right?

I have one thing to say to you.

You are wrong and nothing is okay.